First of all:
GO BUCKS. I fully expect a statue of Tressel
outside the stadium now. Man comes in and beats
Michigan IN Michigan his first year. Hell yes.
And had we only beaten Illinois we'd be Big Ten Champs
right now. It's always somethin' ain't it.
Anyway...
I receiveda
GREAT response to my most recent entry, and it's
simply worthy of addressing, and doing so with an
entry of its own. It seems that entries like this
(without HUGE events) will become few and far
between from now on, so it's almost like taking a
break. First off, the letter... written by an old WTVN
listener:
What's another
month?
It got me
thinking about what changes you are living through
now.
As an example
of just how big this is, how completely wrapped up
in The Journey (or is it almost to the point of
being upgraded to "The JOURNEY" now?) Live Adam
is...
Michael Jordan
walks onto the court and it doesn't even register
anymore. The Jorgasm is no more.
Maybe that's
the comparison: on the one hand, one of the single
greatest players to take the court, who just
happens to be on the downhill side of his storied
career with the end no more than a few years away;
on the other hand...there is no storied career yet,
only the possibilities of the future.
I remember when
Adam Kontras was depressed about...well,
everything, working the graveyard shift on an AM
radio station, life falling apart, marriage #1
toast. I told him then that five years were about a
quarter of his whole life. Well, as much as a
person changes between 15 and 20, so do you change
between 20 and 25, or 26 and 30. It just keeps
going.
Good luck, Live
Adam; and good luck to whoever comes
next.
Now this may not
have had the effect you all think it did. I am by no
means so wrapped up in current career events that I
don't realize how FREAKIN' cool it is. I am very well
aware of how blessed my life is at this moment. I'm
livin' THE GOOD life right now. I just have
to choose my entries wisely, ya know? If I really just
wrote:
OH MY GOD.
OH MY GOD.
OH MY GOD.
Every couple of
days...it'd be sort've silly. I mean,
I found myself two days ago for no apparent
reason, jumping as high as I could in my apartment.
Giddy. Nearly
touching my head to
the ceiling man. Out of the blue just so happy I
couldn't contain myself. And nothing had happened. I
wasn't even thinking about things. I think I was
walking from my desk to the couch, and halfway there
it just hit me. "Time to jump really high" (speaking
of which, losing the weight has certainly allowed
THAT to be possible. I hit the rim at my dad's
house in October. I've never done that. I should
practice...maybe I could slam?) Ahh yes, and
basketball...
There's been no
Jorgasm, because...well they're 2-9 people. And a
Jorgasm for MJ finally hitting 50% just doesn't have
the same MMMPH to it. But I should tell you this...not
only have I taped every game, I have made a 3-4
minute reel of MJ's highlights set to music for all of
'em. I'm tellin' you - every waking moment I need
to produce SOMETHING. As far as my assessment of
Jordan this year...it's so difficult. I still feel he
is HIGHLY comparable to where he was in 1998. We all
gotta remember that Jordan from 1996-'98 didn't jump
and fly either...but he still won 3 straight
championships. Now the reason he is struggling of
course is age a bit, but his surrounding players are
putting ALL the pressure on him. I really feel
that had you put the 1998 MJ on this team, he'd
be struggling just the same.
Either
way, here's a video
clip
of the one play in the last game that
basically summed MJ up so far this year...
It also ties in a perfect double entendre
entry title of "Twilight Awareness". He
flies past someone, spins through 2
defenders, goes up on the left side of the
hoop and spins around to the right trying
to lay-it up..vintage MJ - and he misses.
There just isn't the lift. It is VERY
early in the season, but I really
think the tendonitis in his knees is
killin' him.
But he's still
absolutely a joy to watch. He inspires the hell out of
me. Talk about following your heart. He actually
inspires me more than any celebrity figure ever. Maybe
because he has talents I'll NEVER have, I can be
in awe. Anyone else in my field I get competitive
with. Hmmm... Food for thought for sure.
Rereading the
letter...dude - Live Adam is not me. HAHA.
I laugh because of the fact that I've taken
talking about myself in the 3rd person to a new
height. LOL. I guess I should just let it be.
Fine I'm Live Adam if ya want me to be....
...and therein
lies the beauty in all this. It's all happiness. It's
all lined with platinum. The Journey to "make it", is
now deep into "making it". It's no longer "how will
I?", it's "this is how I will". So it's fun!
Everything is happier. Take this for
example...
You know how I
lost all that weight? In that entry in April I
mentioned how I was flipping channels on primetime TV
and realizing that THIS was my competition. Even the
ugly dudes were "hot". Flat stomaches, muscles...all
that. So I had to get in gear because I'd now be
competing on some level with THAT. Well this meeting
on Wednesday is just that. They need to get a "look"
at me. See my body type, see what I look like, get a
feel for that. All the superficial bullshit. But I've
already perpared for it! I lost 50 pounds, and
then started lifting weights. All that for just this
type of situation. That fact makes me want to jump up
and down and scream. All my ducks are
IN A ROW. It's all gonna happen. Or let me
put it this way, everything I CAN control -
I am. And that's what succeeding is all about.
Seeing the road, making it yours - and controlling
every aspect that's yours to control. Not wasting a
second.
I mean, do you
know how many people are out here that aren't doing
that?!?! It blows my mind! You just want to grab these
people and say: "YOU'RE IN LA MAN.
YOU MADE IT. YOU GOT HERE. All you
need to do is be ADEQUATE and you can make it huge"
Seriously, these fuckin' comics that don't practice
their routine? Or do the same goddamn routine for a
year...WHAT? The comics that have goddamn
NOTEBOOKS on stage? Have some fuckin' pride
already. Ugh. Can't get into this. I'll step on a
bunch of toes. Anyway...
So yes,
I realize how amazing this time is. I'm even
close to saying that this may be the best it ever
gets. Before all the expectations get TOO high (though
how the hell is that possible!?!) - but as I've said
all along: The Journey is what's special. And I'm in
the twilight of it. I'm loving every second of my life
right now. Every phone call is more amazing, every
"self-awareness" moment I have shocks me to the point
of elation, it's just awe inspiring.
