I guess we
all know deep down that critics are full of it. But I
still want to know what they say. You know? And then
I read this paragraph about Tim Robbin's
character in Shawshank Redemption:
First of all,
Andy isn't the heroic figure that he is depicted to
be. This is a man who threatens to kill his wife,
then stalks her with a loaded handgun. He
participates eagerly in the warden's kickback
schemes, which he reveals only when double crossed.
Finally, he steals this illegal money, and escapes
from prison. Stellar character.
I want to hurt the
man that wrote this. The review continues supposedly
"showing the truth" behind these horrible characters.
Was I naive to think that these people didn't exist?
Those who have never tasted true passion or emotion?
Who have never lost something so dear that "legal"
doesn't enter into your train of thought? Participates
eagerly in the warden's kickback schemes? Can this guy
relate to what life in prison means? How that would
attack your psyche and your ethics and morale? How can
you be so devoid of empathy that you can't see
this?
AHHHH. I assume
you've all seen the movie - if not, I hate you and
quit reading my journal. LOL. I guess what this really
did to me was once again turn me inward. I can't make
everyone happy. "Duh, Kontras". But really, it is my
intention. I want to blow EVERYONE away. Always.
I don't want one person unhappy with my work. Now
I understand that that's impossible, and heartily
write off morons such as this reviewer. But, at the
same time - I hear their words really deep. It
hits me. It hurts me. It effects me. If this review
was directed at say the upcoming "Journey" 4tvs show,
I would laugh it off on the surface. But then I'd sit
and analyze every word and try to drip every ounce of
truth out of it I could find. It's this whole bi-polar
"I wanna do what
I like/EVERYONE LOVE ME" thing
I got going on.
Take the short for
example. I did it for me, for the show - just to do
it. To see how fast I could produce something like
that. I love the hell out of it. It's just perfect to
me. I'm so happy with it.
But guess who begs
for feedback too? Oh and thanks to everyone who shared
their thoughts on midgets. (sigh).
TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK OF THE SHORT PEOPLE!!
- So I guess I needed to clarify that sentence last
entry with a comma - eh? LOL. I of course didn't want
to hear your thoughts on the strife of the dwarfs. But
I got a chuckle nonetheless smartasses.
Anyway
- It's one of those character traits that
I had hit me and knew I just had to
include it in an entry. This constant
please everyone/please me battle that
rages with my every decision.
I assume Stephen King (wrote
Shawshank) has grown the thick skin and
would laugh at these words, but if I had
created this movie (which I consider one
of the best films ever made) - and someone
said this shit? It would eat at me for
awhile. It's cause you get to a point
where you think you know human nature you
know? Where you can relate to the human
experience. Then you run into a dipshit
like this that must have the life
experience of a fetus. Just mindblowing. A
line within the movie was also the first
thing I sent
to
everyone
at the beginning of the journey. So I may
be a teeeeeeny bit biased.
This all has a
point though. I'm another step closer to realizing
"The Journey" 4tvs show. It's going to very much
be an interactive movie. It's going to start with me
doing a "Late Show" at CD101. I'll have my back to the
audience and the TVs will be the sights and sounds of
whatever's going on. Played out like a scene from a
movie. The opening of course being once and for all
what really happened nearly 3 years ago. The firing
that absolutely jump-started "The Journey". Though the
show will be acted out like a movie, I'll be pausing
life at certain moments and telling the story to the
audience. With the TVs, a truly amazing show is
possible. It's part one-man show, part play, part
movie. It has the ability to be insanely unique and
personal.
And some fuck-up
will say that because of my actions at CD101, he
couldn't concern himself with the rest of it. Because
I was a dick he couldn't relate to.
Hmmm.
Something to think
about for sure. Wow, and this is exactly what a
Journey entry should be. Quick insight, fast read. I
should remember that in the future. LOL.
