I cannot believe it took 11 days.
The title of this entry may not do justice to the news
I'm about to write. Then again, since we've being
eating on roughly $1.25 a DAY (no shit), McDonalds is
like eating caviar...
Something that I tried for 6
months to get in Columbus, I get in Hollywood in 11
days. I will be performing at a theater in Hollywood
EVERY Friday and Saturday night starting at the end of
March for half the door. He's booked me a minimum of
6 WEEKS because that's how long I have
to be on in order to get reviewed. Yes reviewed. That
means this guy's serious about getting press on 4tvs.
He told me he watched the tape I gave him twice, and
thought it was incredible. "Very professional, and
very well done. I still don't know how you edited all
that..."
The place is called "Ahhh!
Capella". Yeah, if that isn't the sign of all signs.
It's a little performance art house with roughly...I'd
say 40-50 seats. He said we could charge $5. Now I
probably won't be the only act for long. Companies
rent out the space for plays, and I'd be the opener on
those nights. I'll be doing an hour every night, but
I'll probably do more when I'm the only act. To tell
you the truth, I've ALWAYS wanted an opportunity to be
the opener. I want people to think about me while
they're watching what they came for. It's kind of a
shitty pleasure for me, but it's kind of like coming
off the bench and KICKING ass. It just feels good. I
of course don't want to be on the bench forever, but
then again 4tvs is an opener for my career in a sense.
I know I won't be doing it forever. It's my opener to
the world.
Obviously the biggest part about
all of this is the press. That makes this THE starting
point for the rest of my career. PERIOD. It was
something I wanted so badly in Coumbus. Anyone who
talked to me during the latter half of '99 knew I was
simply searching for that weekly gig that I could
point people to, and that the press could write about.
Well, this guy's giving me the opportunity. His faith
in the show will make this roll. He handed me 12
Friday and Saturday gigs. And this is the sort of
place that people go to on the weekends simply because
they know that cool shit is gonna be there. Artsy
people that like seeing new and different stuff. They
tell their friends and...wow. This really is huge. I'm
not sure I can even grasp what an amazing break this
is. And so quickly...
I feel the way I did the day I
booked my first gig. I went to a picnic table near
Champps (where my first gig was), and I just stared at
the sky and yelled. I had a feeling of accomplishment
that I had never felt before. I couldn't believe that
the hard work had paid off. All the thousands of
dollars, and the infamous moment that I always
flashback to: buying the televisions. Handing my
credit card to the cashier and buying 4 TVs. It was
such a gut check of a moment. There was no turning
back...AT ALL. How do you rationalize 4 TVs? But at
that moment on the picnic table, I knew I was on the
right track (little did I know the disaster that
awaited me on the first gig). Be sure to check out the
shows
section of the site and read about that fateful night.
Heh heh. What a way to start off 4tvs.
I also have two other gigs that I
booked yesterday that I initially got on the computer
to tell you about. Right before I went to write this
Entry I decided to call "Ahhh! Capella" to see what
was up. OH AND THERE'S A LESSON TO BE LEARNED THERE
FELLOW MUSICIANS:
This guy felt THAT strongly about
4tvs, yet I still had to call him. YOU have to knock
down that door. YOU. YOU. YOU. No one else will do it
for you. I'm gonna put my entire Columbus phone log on
the net in a couple of days so you can see what I went
through with some people. I'm a bit uneasy about
putting the current one up because I may alienate
myself. I can definitely be honest to a fault
sometimes, but I have no reservations about the
Columbus one. I burned no bridges in Columbus, and was
completely honest about the DICKS. Bottom line is my
motto in life: "It's amazing how lucky you get when
you work your ass off" So don't wait for them to call
you. I they say they're gonna watch your tape, call
'em in two days and ask how it was. If they ask for a
week obviously give it to them, but never let up.
Don't EVER SAY THIS SENTENCE: "Well, I gave 'em a tape
and they never called back..." People that utter those
words are nimrods that don't deserved to be called
back. Of the 43 places I am currently working here in
LA (with roughly 5 calls/visits each), I have 3 call
backs. Think about that.
Anyway, the Ha Ha gig is actually
a contest. A 10 week contest worth $2500 to the
winner, $500 for 2nd place, and $250 for 3rd. The guy
running it really dug the tape and said he would find
a way to work around my long set-up. I'm gonna write a
set specifically for this contest. I need 7 minutes of
material that will make me stand out in a batch of
(get this) 140 comedians. What a great challenge. I
can't wait to start working on it.
In other news (man a lot has
happened already this month), I had a meeting today
with a guy who's producing a movie right now. He was
interested in my 4tvs tape and wanted to talk with me.
This of course was pretty big news, and I knew I had
to look my best. This could be a big break. So I
picked up half my tooth and stuck it back in, and it
worked. I just had to be sure to put my tongue on it
to keep it in place in between sentences, but I knew
for this meeting it was pretty necessary to have it
in. No way a Hollywood producer would take me serious
in THIS town with a my front tooth chipped in half.
Well not a whole lot came of the meeting other than
him wanting to get me involved in some way. This may
be a way for me to bring a little cash home doing
GRUNT work. WHO CARES! At least it's grunt work on a
movie set. I'll find out more next week, but the
highlight of the conversation was my tooth falling
out.
I did a video
re-enactment of it for you. It was quite
an adrenaline rush. He was looking down at
my CD when I touched my lower lip to my
tooth and "pop". FUCK ME. Somehow I
slipped it back into place in what had to
be THE most nerve racking 3 seconds - and
he never noticed. The only thing worse
than having a chipped tooth in this
situation would be knocking it out while
you're TALKING to the guy. If you could've
seen my face, it might have been the
funniest thing you ever saw. For now
you'll just have to "make-believe" with
the video
re-enactment.
Enjoy.
YouTube
link added
02.13.09
Well, that's it. Sorry there's not
more to tell you about right now. Hopefully something
will happen in the coming days that's
interesting.
Oh, and Jess wanted me to tell you
that Starbucks is going absolutely perfect. I really
think in a year she's gonna OWN one. I've never seen
her so gung-ho before. I can't tell you how happy that
makes me. The guilt of taking her so far away from
home is starting to fade as I see her so successful.
And on top of all this, Jess and I got a bit sunburned
today lying by the pool. :-) Man, am I asking for a
bunch of "Fuck you" emails or what?